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Average DAPS Reader: Ofiicially Hates Pete Wentz
Fucking guy. You guys remember Fall Out Boy? Yes, you do, you asshat. Well former bassist Pete Wentz has decided to form his own “electro-pop” band called Bl4ck C4rds. yes, there are 4s in their name...
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Average DAPS Reader: Knows The Identity Of The Bed Intruder. (Marty McFly)
Since July 18th, the date that the infamous bed intruder interview was broadcast on NBC affiliate WAFF-48 News in Huntsville, Antoine Dodson has been searching for his sworn enemy known only as “The...
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Average DAPS Reader: Can Watch Carlo Get A Brazilian Wax at Dyanna Body and...
Man, oh man. What a week. What a hairless and wild week. I’ve always felt like all of those sexy women you see on the tv, except now I look like one. As you probably already know, I was invited to...
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Average DAPS Reader: Can Finally Come to Terms With the Casey Anthony Verdict
Yesterday was a historic day for people who pay attention to trivial court cases on cable television. Casey Anthony, tabloid baby butcher, was deemed not guilty of First or Second Degree Murder by a...
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Average DAPS Reader: Wouldn’t Eat A Human To Save Their Life, Even If It Does
swallow it bitches. Gelatin, as we are all well aware by now, is essentially powdered animal bodies. Typically, gelatin is used in food products, like Jell-O and candy or in capsules for medicine. But...
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Average DAPS Reader: Ends Up On The Daily Show Propagating Italian Stereotypes
Staten Island, DAPS’ home base, is widely known for it’s guidos. Seriously, we make the best ones. Last night, The Daily Show decided to put a bunch of Staten Islanders in a room and asked them to...
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Average DAPS Reader: Is Late Getting their 2010 NY Comic-Con Coverage Up
Editor’s Note: I am 100% aware that this is far too late for the mile-a-minute pace of the internet, but YOU didn’t have to shoot or edit all this crap for literally negative dollars! If you cared that...
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Average DAPS Reader: Can’t Lie About Their Size Anymore
Oh those crazy Koreans, always doing shady studies about penis sizes. These nutty guys have decided that they can figure out how big a dude’s wiener is by measuring their index and ring fingers. But it...
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